Simon’s Story
My name is Simon, I am 35 and come from the north of Germany. I have been suffering from PSSD since I was 17. I will tell you why I took SNRIs/ why I was prescribed them.
At the age of 15, due to the separation of my parents, I moved to another city, which was about 100 km away from my old home. This meant that I had to change schools, which of course is not really nice at that age, because I could see my friends less often. In addition, I did not get along well with my new classmates and was bullied. I stayed at school for two years until I finally dropped out after the ninth grade. My mother bought me a 125cc motorcycle during this time so that I could go back to my old home, at least on weekends.
I was feeling bad at the time, so I went to see a psychologist. I described my problems to him, whereupon he prescribed Trevilor (Venlafaxin) to me.
"It should be noted that the conversation lasted less than 10 minutes."
At that time I was still naive enough to trust the doctor completely and so I took the tablets.
Immediately on the first evening I got sweats and felt very unwell, so that I could only lie in bed. After one day the symptoms disappeared and so I continued to take the medicine. I quickly noticed that ejaculation was very prolonged and it was difficult to "come". Before I took the medication, I had a very pronounced libido, which I remember well. Since the whole thing happened at an age when you are still developing, the changed situation naturally impacted severely on my self-worth. The worst part was the feeling of not knowing what was wrong with me.
After I stopped the medication, I was able to ejaculate as I had before. However, the orgasm was as good as gone and my libido was zero. The "orgasm" if you can even call it that, I only felt very lightly on the penis, which is still the case today. Usually, I cannot feel anything at all. I also noticed how many emotions like joy, but also sadness disappeared.
At that time, I did not see any connection between the medication and what I was experiencing. I did not know anything about PSSD. Nevertheless, I spent hundreds of hours on the Internet researching, visited one doctor after another and tried countless medications. I saw every urologist I could find nearby, had several MRIs, tried hypnotherapy, and saw sex therapists. The whole thing cost me several thousand euros, since many of these doctors had private practices.
"I was also in a group therapy for a long time, because all the doctors thought that the problems must be psychological, since nothing could be determined physically."
I was prescribed many different antidepressants, which I also took. I never had any positive effects from them.
Only after years did I learn about PSSD and a light came on in my head. It was at least a good feeling to know what was wrong with me after all these years. At that time, I still thought that the condition might stay like this for a while, but surely a cure would be discovered soon. Well, in the meantime, as I said, I am 35 and there is still no light at the end of the tunnel. I have gotten used to the situation and so far lead a good life. I have a son, a nice house, just finished my master's degree and I am content as far as this is possible with PSSD.
I have had a lot of relationships, but unfortunately they always break up, which of course is due to the lack of libido and emotion. The symptoms are different for everyone. What frustrates me the most is the complete lack of libido, which, as you can imagine, leads to not insignificant problems when being together with a woman. I would very much like to see a cure soon, so that I can at least enjoy sexuality for the rest of my life.